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Crazy Bosses: The Bully
Stanley Bing Diagnoses Your Insane Situations
Crazy Bosses: The Bully

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    by Brooke Eaton
    Monster Staff Writer

    “The issue is control. And the foundation of that control is the hammerlock the bully places on the world outside his head. His perceptions ARE reality. The bully cannot be wrong. That would mean the world was out of his control. No, people who contradict the bully are not simply boneheads. They’re disloyal. Traitors. Must be…expunged.”
    -- Crazy Bosses: Fully Revised and Updated by Stanley Bing

    Sharing your desire to move on with your superior can be difficult, especially when your boss is known to be a hothead. Monster member MJSM1239 suspects a boss was sabotaging the job search: I foolishly told my boss of eight years I wanted to move on. He said he would be supportive but got really nasty. I applied for two jobs outside the company and had great first interviews, but on the second interviews I was hit with, ‘Why do you want to work here? You don't like this kind of work. You'll quit on us just like you quit your other job.’ I explained why I did want to work there, and then I asked where this was coming from, and the answer was ‘We were told.’ And then they went on to say that they weren't at liberty to say who told them. I applied for a number of internal jobs, had great first interviews and had second interviews scheduled but then received very short emails saying, ‘We can no longer offer you a second interview’ or ‘We can no longer consider you as a candidate.’ My favorite (and keep in mind this is after a second interview was scheduled): ‘We are only considering suitable candidates.’ Never any reason and never any answer when I follow up.

    Bing’s Diagnosis

    “That’s right, ladies and gentleman, this mean, duplicitous, stinky, horrible bully was, in fact, going behind this fellow’s back and wrecking his possibilities for advancement -- what a loser,” says Bing. “The bully likes to scare people. When he’s not scaring people, he’s actually thumping them in the face. And they’re tough: Tough to take, tough to manage, tough to deal with on a daily basis.”

    But the Bully might be so preoccupied by his own wrath that a little strategy on your part could go a long way. The key here is to give the outward impression of loyalty and acquiescence, but to stay fearless on the inside.

    Bing Suggests
    1. Be patient.
    2. Don’t take things personally, because you’re probably not the only one who is being pushed around.
    3. Treat the bully with care.
    4. Stay away when you think it’s wise to do so.
    5. When you have the bully’s trust, push back. Not all the time. Not even often -- but often enough to begin to change the ground rules.
    “In the end, you know, a boss needs you as much as you need him,” says Bing. “That gives you power over all of them, even bullies.”

    More Help for Dealing with a Bully Boss
    Other Crazy Bosses in this Feature: